After the funeral is over: Your checklist
To Honour | To Remember | To Heal.
It’s not uncommon for grieving family members to wonder what happens after a funeral. They might also wonder what the future holds for them after losing someone very dear. There’s lots of information available in terms of planning a funeral and the grieving process, but the information seems to stop there.
Here at Tong & peryer Funeral Directors, we are more than a funeral director, and as such our care is for both the living and the dead. We understand how difficult experiencing the death of a loved one is, which is why we have written the below advice to help you navigate through the challenging path of grief.
Registering a death in New Zealand
The Death Certificate is the official document registering the death, and is produced by the state based Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages to record all deaths that occur in New Zealand. The Death Certificate is different from the Cause of Death Certificate given by a doctor at the time of death. In order to recieve a death certificate, your funeral director will request specific information required and register the death within 24 hours of the funeral.
The Death Certificate is needed for legal and financial reasons and may take several weeks to receieve from the registry.
Handling the deceased estate after the funeral
Check there is a will for details
If your loved one left a valid will, they would name the executor in the will. It’s always better if your loved one writes a will because then everything is laid down and those left behind know what to do. A record of wishes is also advisable, so that family and friends know what you want.
When someone passes away and hasn’t left a will, it’s called an intestacy, or dying intestate.
If the person has no real estate or their assets do not exceed more than $15,000 from each institution (e.g. savings, shares, Kiwisaver), their estate is considered a small estate and can be managed and distributed by their next of kin.
If the person has more than $15,000 worth of assets or owns property, then formal administration of the estate is required by law and certain processes must be followed for managing and distributing the person’s estate. For further details click here to go to the Public Trust.
Apply for Probate if applicable
If the estate contains a lot of money or property, the executor or the administrator may have to apply for a grant of representation to gain access to the money.
Applying for probate may not be necessary if the person who dies had jointly owned land, property, shares, or money or only had savings or premium bonds. As this is complex topic, we recommend seeking legal advice. A good reference site can be found with the High Court within the New Zealand Justice Department.
Helps you to notify one or more organisations of a death.
After a death, one of the more arduous tasks is to close out all the relationships the deceased had with various organisations, such as the bank, Inland Revenue, Ministry of Social Development, Work & Income, Internal Affairs Passports Office. Soon this will also include insurers and telecommunication companies, councils and energy companies, Kiwi saver etc. MyTrove is a free service.
After a death, this can be an arduous task for an executor to close down these accounts . MyTrove will reduce the administrative burden by grieving families by reducing paperwork, removing the need to visit multiple organisations that require essentially the same information, and allowing personal and offical death data to work together. The service is free for those notifying of a death.
On the myTrove website, there are also some valuable reference links that will help with other relevant services, like how to close down a Facebook or Instagram account, LinkedIn accounts, check for unclaimed money at IRD etc.
Hold onto happy memories with memorial ideas
A memorial is a way you can cherish happy memories of a loved one, and it can also be a great comfort. It serves as a focus for grief or a place you can visit and remember the person who has passed away. Here are some ideas for you to reflect on.
Place a memorial bench
If you want to place a memorial bench in a public place, you need permission from the local authorities. It’s also possible to dedicate a bench at your local crematorium, cemetery, or churchyard. Memorial benches are a touching way to honour a loved one’s memory, wherever you place them, it could even be in their favourite place in the garden at your home.
Keep an online memorial to share with friends and family
A very informal way to hold onto your happy memories is by creating an online memorial. Use it to publish memorial news, tributes, and messages of grief. Families can use it to find support and celebrate the life of their loved one. You can also use an online memorial for communities to pay their respects, organise meet-ups and gatherings, crowd-fund for charities, help children and grandchildren learn about the lives of their relatives who have passed, and even bring separated families together. Tong & Peryer offer this as part of their obituary section, but there are so many other platforms to consider also.
Plant a tree or dedicate a garden
Green or natural funerals are becoming more popular. You can use your loved ones ashes, mixed together with some soil as a medium for planting a tree. However, you should only use a small amount as ashes are not plant-friendly. They contain a high pH and level of sodium and could harm the plant if they’re not mixed with the right quantity of soil and organic matter.
The best place for the rest of the ashes is in a container placed in the ground near any roots. Take the tribute one step further and plant a whole garden around the memorial tree in loving memory of a loved one. If your loved one was an avid gardener, memorial garden ideas would be a fitting tribute.
Order a keepsake
Jewellery is a common and meaningful idea if you want to keep your loved one close when they’ve passed away. Other companies can turn your loved one’s ashes into alternative memorial keepsakes such as within glass ornaments, paperweights. We have a numbers of ideas presented within the funeral home if you would like to come visit and talk through the various options.
Memorialisation
Like Tong & Peryer, Headstone World has been supporting Hawkes Bay families for over 100 years. We partner with them because they have one of the most experienced teams in New Zealand, offering caring service and the latest technology specialising in the design and creation of high-quality headstones, memorials, and monuments. If your looking for memorial plaques, headstones, plot enclosures or restoration we recommend you look at Headstone World to meet all your needs.